Hello!

My stuff from UO has arrived. The scarf is possibly the best purchase ive ever made from UO! So soft, warm and snuggly. Anyway, I've completed my FYP for almost a week now....after much deliberation, I would like to conclude....

my biggest talents are,
- accidentally offending people
- accidentally fking things up
- deliberately offending people
- deliberately fking things up
- procrastination

that is all.

Hello!

It's over. FYP's over. Yet I feel so empty inside, it wasn't the feeling I expected! I thought I would be happy but no, it felt like my commitment with fyp is no more.... Meanwhile....

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. peace!

im constantly torn between im lonely i want someone, and im terribly afraid of love its better to be alone

Hello!

This time, I'm at the central library. My wisdom tooth on the left is coming out. It hurts really bad cause the gum is being pushed and dying. I could only whisper now, it hurts just moving my jaw. Anyway, it's exactly a week's time till my submission. Almost there, because I am honestly trying to catch my breath! :(

Today, otw to the library, I was thinking of all these strangers I met on the cabin. I really wanted to smile, because I like being smiled at, too. Smiling for no reason, but simply to acknowledge your presence. It's really nice! Unfortunately, I didn't in the end.

I'd frowned instead, frowned to the ground, to the sweaty back of a man, to the train pole which I could imagine all these germs passed from passengers holding to it. Very unhappy. SIGH

i don't like it that when i admit to something which im totally honest with and the person either goes, "oh. ok" or "why?". i would answer the latter with all my heart and then get another "oh. ok". giving you a crap reply.

it is so annoying and frustrating.

also, why can't you love yourself?

exactly! 

Moonbeam

My birthday was okay. I don't expect much cause I've always felt that birthdays.....they happen every year....it's just an age, a number, which shouldn't define anything. So, no parties, no cake, no hoo ha. I lied to somebody my family bought me a cake. Haha! Although, I'd secretly indulge myself in some online shopping. Bought this wonderful tapestry....

It's going to be perfect. My new room is going to be awesome. It's terribly small, but it'll be great cause my dad promised me to install built in speakers inside the mock walls (is that what you call them? those hollow cardboardish walls). And then i can play my favorite music and curl into my sheets, facing the reservoir. 

Was chatting with Kenneth and realized, i really need a life. I've not stepped out of the house for any recreational purpose...since idk....last October? No friends. Just school and home everyday. Attended somebody's funeral with my mom. Planning to visit this artsy area, was considering of asking my friends but idk....

My mom got sick today, on the first day of Chinese New Year! Super bummed, didn't get to go to Malaysia in the end. Somehow, I just can't wait to leave this shit-hole. Just don't feel like I belong. 

Happened to read somebody's blog and I feel really sad. I wish I didn't.


Well, anyway, hello to you! It's a Thursday today. Annnnnnndddddd, tomorrow's my birthday so I'm going to make it extra special for you. Yes you, reader. Come back soon and check it out!

May I remind everyone that I have exactly less than 20 days before the FINAL FINAL FINAL submission for my damned fyp? It's going to be awesome, on that day I will be eating cheesefries and have a  dance with my dogs to celebrate. ;)