there must be a reason why nobody really cares, so i must be ugly. both inside and out. i should really change but change is difficult. what's there to change when i can't identify the mistakes that i suppose i have cast upon. god. i really want to give up everything and just stare into space under the bridge or something. perhaps losing my mind, one or the other would be pleasurable as well. i wish. i wish i can just blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
i'm 18, but i feel like 81.