Friday, October 4, 2013

are we still considered friends even if we don't talk anymore

happened to come across one of my friend's tumblr. she posted a photo of me and her and another person together when she was hanging in my place....way way back from a few years ago. i had to italicise that because im genuinely unsure if we are friends. because we do not talk or interact with each other anymore and it makes me so sad. i do miss her! we had so many silly and happy memories....cliche and all but people do move on after a while. and it makes me reflect about my self-worth. would the 'friends' that i have now or just made, eventually become like that, too?

today, i'd attended a mixer (yay alcohol in school!!) within the cohort of my new course mates. it's very exciting and nerve wrecking at the same time (which i'm sure everyone feels the same) when you meet new people. especially in a place with a even wider cultural background and what not. it can get more complicated; the judging nature of us etc. however i really don't want to back out on it, you know, being scare and nervous and the 'its awkward i don't want to do it' thinking. as much as i hate it, the worst scenario could just be a rejection. just a rejection, mind you!

thank you chinese (my friend, elky), for posing!

so coming back to this friendship thing. now that i've grown older and seemingly wiser, making and having friends is obviously very different from when we were in primary school. the times when we could 'unfriend' someone just because they wore knee socks instead of ankle socks (lol, yes it'd happened to me) or become friends again 10 minutes later. now, not that i don't experience similar situations at my age (just blown up into more complicated discrimination instead), but people tend to be more forgiving as they grow older, or at least appear to me. unfortunately, maybe as we got older, our mindset of making friends have widen. 

...just because i lost you, doesn't mean i cannot befriend someone else like you, or even better!

 it's really sad. because in my head, all i think of was the fond memories (this sound like some really bad copy writing for a greeting card). :( friends, friends, i hope i don't loose any because it's just such a happy thing to be with people you can be happy with! gosh, i sound like a child...not thinking straight anymore. till then x

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